Dusting off the old journal

Am I only going to post once a year? I hope not. I miss writing but with chores, commutes, dinners and life to be lived it’s hard to find the time. Umm, we got married? I’m going to have to update that “About Us” page. There is nothing more to say about the wedding than it was a wedding. We got married in an ancient Vedic ceremony. I found it hard to be “in the moment” during the wedding. It goes so fast! The nice part was that other than my clothes we were both so hands-off about everything and our wedding was immediately followed by traveling around India so I didn’t suffer that post-wedding letdown. Also, I love India. I love love love it and Booboo and I have already planned our next trip. The flights were just too haphazard last time so we ended up seeing a bit of Uttarakhand, but next year we’ll probably be going to Kerala.

So I’m also back because I have big news. After a crazy amount of searching, we bought a home! It’s beautiful and large and we can grow into it for a while. We are staying urban because Booboo can’t abide the suburbs. He grew up in an industrial college town in India (think the equivalent of Pittsburgh) and then departed quickly for the swampy climes of Bombay and never looked back. I’ve floated the idea of the ‘burbs or the country or some other places where parking wouldn’t be at such a premium but I only ever got blank stares and uncomfortable shifting in response so I took the hint and we only looked for places in the great NY metro area. For some people urban New York living means directly on the island, but I’ve always believed that the best approach to New York is to live directly across the banks of the rivers. Right now we’re directly across the upper East Side, but we’ll be moving Hudson-side soon. It’s the best possible compromise between my hunger for green space and B’s love of being immersed in the hustle and bustle of The City (as everyone here calls it).

I’ll miss this place! We had an overwhelming number of people look at our apartment the other day and I think both B and I began to feel like “are we crazy for moving? Apparently we backed into the best real estate of all time!” People walk into our place and are like “wow!” I don’t mean to say that we live in this ultra hip, sleek, sexy space. In fact, we have tile floors, a very dated kitchen and no laundry in the building. But our apartment is bright and spacious and there is no wasted space or craftily assembled bedroom carved out of living space (that ends up darkened due to lack of windows given over to the faked bedroom). Every inch of this place has been planned and designed for maximum light exposure and a feeling of open. In spite of that, it rained yesterday and I could feel the apartment walls closing in on us a bit. It used to be much worse when I actually HAD a Manhattan apartment that suffered from faked bedrooms and dark miserable living areas. So I began to think about our new home, which is pretty damn big (lots of bedrooms with a finished basement) and lofty and modern and realized that we’re giving up a great apartment for an awesome home. This apartment had its time and place and all credit for sourcing this amazing neighborhood and realtor and building goes to my husband, who has a 6 year history with the building (!!) I know we’ll pass it on to people who will love it and enjoy it as much as they can.

In the meantime, Booboo and I are trading views of apartment buildings on the upper East side for this:

Around the corner from our home.

Around the corner from our home.

Of course, it’s not perfect, hence the return. We have some…design plans. I say “…” because the biggest showdown in our house right now is whether this home goes Bombay Bordello or Clean Contemporary. Stay tuned.

Posted in Dirty Jerz, The Pursuit of Home | Tagged | Leave a comment


Well then. Not-posting got out of hand, eh? Blogging seems harder than when I first started. Partly because most people seem to have migrated to social networks and Twitter and such and you lose the little community you build around your own ego-stroking internet placeholder. Also, I find it harder to blog now that I no longer practice law. Turns out there is lot more life to live when you’re not a lawyer, moaning about law school and your petty legal angst and shit. Also, fewer documents to read.

Okay, all that said, while I have been unable to blog my wedding planning and all the OTHER stuff that’s happened…I do want to keep a journal for my upcoming trip to India. First, I have not been back to India in 15 years. Second, I have not taken a transatlantic flight since 2001.


BooBoo and I made it legal (in the eyes of the IRS, if not the Gods) a few months back because our parents reported from India that the priests in Goa will not marry you without evidence of a registered marriage first. Or you incur more fees or something. I’m not actually sure if this is true or not. It certainly sounds true but it also could just be that they got sick of us living in sin.

So anyway, I’ve been sashaying about saying My Husband this and My Husband that over November, December and January and after a while the wedding began to feel like overkill. However, as we’ve neared the date of departure till *mumblemumble tomorrow* we’ve both become more excited about the prospect of going back.

So here we go. Tomorrow we’ll be taking my first ever ultra-long-haul. EWR to BOM. I feel queasy, we’ve got a million things left to do and I still don’t have a wedding dress because the one my parents bought me met with an unfortunate accident*. Three weeks in my homeland. I don’t know if and when I’ll go back there, so I’m planning to enjoy myself.

India 2013 Itinerary

Sex Bob-Ombay: land, shop, evacuate

Goa: beach villa with friends in Calangute and wedding in Dona Paula. I fully plan to show BooBoo my ancestral temples. My marriage to BooBoo has seen me excommunicated, as he (sadly) does not have the privilege of being a Maharashtrian Brahmin. So I figure I may gaze upon my lineage one last time. Time will also be spent doing wedding stuff like having turmeric and henna smeared all over me.

Sex Bob-Ombay Again: checking out the Alma Pater et Vir. Will not swim in Powaii Lake as it seems totally horrifying.

How Pure in Kanpur? BooBoo nostalgically shows me around his days of being an Indian bad boy (“this is where I skipped math class for 10 minutes”). Maybe we’ll catch a movie, I refuse to take any buses, which are ostensibly just rape wagons.

We’ll try our Lucknow rather than Later: I am actually QUITE excited about this, mostly for St-Martiniere’s College, which is Hogwarts if you stuck it in India.

New Delhi Belly: a brief stop-over for administrative stuff. I insist upon Humayun’s tomb and the Lodhi gardens.

Come On Kumaon: our mini-moon to North of Nainital.

Dilly Delhi: one last day before we fly out. To be spent shopping no doubt.

Things I’m disappointed we did not get to do: Kashmir. If there’s a reason for me to go to India again it’s that I want to see Kashmir and Leh. Maybe Kerala.

reporting from Queens,


*of course BooBoo has an amazing Armani suit. GAH.

Posted in India, Travel, Uncategorized, Us, Wedding | 2 Comments

Where to Begin?

There are so many things I want to write about.

  • The many different companies, individuals and heretofore undiscovered aphorisms I never knew existed before Boo Boo: Pinster (Pinterest), Winky Links (WikiLeaks), Jerry Springler (Jerry Springer), who let the cat out of the box (out of the bag) and Arnold Swassnegger (Swassnegger for sure, good call Boo Boo).
  • Wedding: what’s the deal with our registry? We vacillate between setting it up and saying fuck it. I think we’ve finally given in and decided to have one because it’s kind of fun to set up and people keep asking about it.
  • Everything that worries me about going back to India: everything worries me about going back to India.

Maybe I should just start at the beginning and at least recount how we met. I was talking to Cagey on the phone the other day and she was like “you know, you kept posting a picture here and there but I wasn’t sure if he was your boyfriend or your employee.” LOL.

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Hello Ringy, it’s Good to Meet You.

Boo Boo is sitting around watching a movie by that dude who made Gangs of Fussypur, which for all intents and purposes seems to be Sopranos for India. The director seems to specialize in the anti-Bollywood style-lots of realism, quite depressing. Everything is stark and grim and the actors actually look Indian. That said, I usually can’t follow the plots (Gangs of Fussypur was completely unfollowable for me), which makes this a good time for me to introduce everyone to Ringy.

Readers, I had to wait some time for Ringy. It was around July that Boo Boo raised the issue of sidling into connubial bliss with one another, but no form of pressurized carbon or corundum made any sort of appearance until finally I was like “HEY WHERE’S RINGY BOO BOO HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN I’M AMERICAN?” Actually, that’s slightly inaccurate, because what actually happened was that I slid dreamy-eyed into visions of myself in a whorey net saree marrying Boo Boo by a seaside mandap the minute the M-word was spoken until my parents roused me out of my reverie by raising the issue of Putting a Ring on It. After which I had to relay to Boo Boo that they were actually quite worried that we weren’t For Real engaged until a mineral deposit was made on to my left hand finger. That said, both our parents put aside their concerns over for reallness and went ahead and planned the wedding sans engagement ring, because when your 30 some-some children say they might be getting married you don’t play son. So all of a sudden your prospective in-laws are calling from India and letting you know that 4 independent and trustworthy snakecharmers set your wedding date for you and your dad calls ten minutes after to tell you that the name of the venue and that the deposit’s already down so you’re getting married in five months WHEEEE!

Anyway, Boo Boo gave me Ringy last week and while I never thought I’d be that person who spends way too much time raising her left hand and drooling over her ring-damn it, this thing has me transfixed.

Posted in Home Life, Us, Wedding | 1 Comment